Slow Sports Night

I was channel surfing Sunday night when I came across a competitive eating contest on ESPN2. The competition involved Krystal hamburgers. If you aren't familiar with Krystal hamburgers, they are eerily similar to White Castle hamburgers. If you aren't familiar with White Castle hamburgers, then you are out of luck. These are the only two small square hamburgers that I can think of.

For what it's worth, I love Krystal hamburgers. They don't sell them here in Denver so I always make a point to have them when I go back to Florida. This perplexes my family as they equate Krystal with food only slightly more edible than car tires. But I digress.

Takeru Kobayashi downed 97 Krystal hamburgers in eight minutes. It was disgusting to watch. However, it was like a wreck, you just had to watch. I decided to look at Takeru's other accomplishments.

Eater Profiles

Takeru Kobayashi
Nagano, Japan
Age: 27
Weight: 160

Brats: 58 Johnsonville Brats / Brat Days / 10 Minutes/ Aug. 5, 2006

Cow Brains: 57 (17.7 pounds) / 15 minutes

Hamburgers: Krystals: 97 Krystal Burgers / 8 minutes/October 28, 2006

Hot Dogs: 53 3/4 Nathan's Famous Hot Dogs and buns / 12 minutes/ July 4, 2006

Lobster Rolls: 41 Lobster Rolls in Boston challenge / 10 minutes/Sept. 23, 2006

Rice Balls: 20 pounds rice balls / 30 minutes

Kobayashi continued to dominate the sport of competitive eating in 2006, once again breaking a record in Coney Island by eating 53.75 hot dogs in 12 minutes. This was his sixth consecutive win at the big dance. However, Joey Chestnut was close on his heels with 52 HDB's--a record for the American eaters. The rivals also finished closely in the 2006 Krystal Square Off--Kobayashi with 97 burgers in 8 minutes, and Joey with 92. After six years of domination, this champion of champions may finally have some serious competition.

International Federation of Competitive Eating

The most disturbing accomplishment would have to be the cow brains. What kind of endorsement deal does this guy get?

Are you hungry yet?